On the journey of healing, there are some fine prints, which we sometimes ignore, to read them, and then those final prints are actually writing the whole story. And in order to become aware of those fine prints, you have to be wide awake and look closely look carefully, what is that fine print say. So, I have named those fine prints or I will say that I have separated them into three categories.
Your OPINION about yourself, or SOMEBODY else’s opinion about you
One of them is I call your opinion about yourself, or somebody else’s opinion about you, which you carry unknowingly, and then you act as it is stemmed on you. So, you can see that as a judgment passed on to you, by others about you, or you have made some judgments about yourself.
I have listed some examples below for you
I met a young woman, and she kept telling me that I’m very selfish. And that’s why people don’t like me. So I asked her, who told you that you are selfish, she says everybody says that. But even then continuing with my questions, as my way is, who said that to you then she started looking closely at the fine print and realized not everybody is saying that she is selfish, but there are a few people, those who have concluded about her that she is selfish. And then she bought that conclusion from them. And ever since then, she feels she is a selfish person. She’s not a good person, she cannot be trusted, because she’s selfish. And she doesn’t like other people, those who are selfish, I said Okay, so let’s check it out.
Let’s look at the meaning of the word selfish. What does it mean? So then check the word out. It doesn’t mean that selfish people are mean people. Selfish people are people, those who take care of themselves. But the meaning of the word goes in a way that selfish means the person who is mean and who doesn’t take care of others. That is not true. That was not the meaning of the word. The word meant that you take care of yourself. And then she said oh my god, the world changed for her.
Here’s another example to illustrate the point
Another example. A person thinks he’s slow. He’s very slow. I’m slow. I don’t get you. I’m very slow. Can you be slow? Because I don’t get it. You have to be really slow with me. Okay, we have to break it down. When did you decide that you are slow or who told you that you are slow?
So, one of the boss always told him, you are slow. You will take forever to do it right. But I asked him, Do you do right in the first time or you do it wrong? And then you do it right. He said I do it right in first time because that’s how I want to be. I don’t want to rush through things and do it wrong. And I want to do it right the first time. I said so are you slow? Or you careful? Or you What do you think now with this? Thinking of yours? Are you slow or you trying to do it right for the first time. I said that’s were him. I don’t want to make mistakes. Do something over and over.
You have to find out, why did you decide you have to find out that is what is reading the fine prints
Another person who said my fingers are going numb, I can’t work. I can’t hold things. And I was young. I used to be super fast. Everybody who Looks at me in a comment, oh my God, how can you do it so fast, you are like a rocket and you are so fast. And now she’ll spend almost 30 years of her life doing things very fast. Now, she is not finding it physically possible to continue to do things fast.
And that is going against her definition of hers, which has been given to her in an appreciation mode, you are Superwoman. She wants to live up to that image of Superwoman. And when she’s unable to, then she becomes nervous and her fingers, they go numb. And this numbness can increase, travel to arms, and shoulders, and might have frozen shoulders after that you might go in for surgery to get it fixed, etc. So this is what is the journey that you decide to take.
Your decision is also there you agreed to take on the journey under those titles. I’m a superwoman and do it very fast and I’m slow. I’m selfish. You decided when did you decide? You have to find out, why did you decide you have to find out that is what is reading the fine prints. So when you read those fine prints, you laugh at it. I say okay, I don’t want to use those fine prints anymore. And that gives you relief.
You become free from your own image
You become free from your own image, which you are carrying with yourself whatever it takes, whatever effort it takes, but you have to carry that image with you. And that is troublesome. That takes away all your energy and in the presence of those definitions of yours kept there. No one can heal you. No one can. So, you have to let your definitions about yourself go. Does not matter whether you define yourself or others define you and have put labels on you. Look beyond those labels. Your labels should not be defining you. They will come as one big barrier and getting back to yourself. Your labels define you more than who you are and healing doesn’t go like that. In healing, you have to be yourself and not any label.
YouTube Channel Name: Dr. Alka Chopra Madan
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