Parenting needs to be learned!!

Formal education is given the highest importance in everyone’s life. Which school do you go to? What subjects did you study? Based on your certificates and degrees, how learned are you? Formal education has become a symbol of success. Many Asian countries, most notably China, the Philippines, and India, worry about which kindergarten a child will attend, and which school he will attend when they start school. They are highly concerned about ‘What is his score? How intelligent is he? How quickly can he recite things?’. 

A child going to a prestigious school, and getting the best marks, scores, or grades, is actually a symbol of having something. Afterward, they wish for their child to go to the best college and get into the best universities. And. when they get a job, they tell everyone around them that their child works for ‘XYZ, Fortune 500, or Fortune 1000’ company so that others will hold them in high esteem and congratulate them.

In order to achieve greater status for their children, parents adhere to the belief that their children should do more than they did. It is as if the poor child is being scrutinized with a microscope, a telescope, and through various filters. In their minds, parents think they know what is best for their children and that they will make the right decision for them. Maybe they’re right about all those things because that’s what parents do, that’s why it’s so rampant.

 Somewhere this education also has a slogan, and that slogan is “Do better.”- No matter what you have accomplished, there is always room for improvement. Thus, people teach their children various methods to improve their memory so that they are able to store more data and retrieve it during testing or examinations. There is a lot of pressure involved in living this way due to which children start becoming restless and are unable to focus. Instead of finding out why they can’t focus, we try to find out how to help them focus.

We label this as a kind of disease Asperger’s Syndrome or autism. I have seen these things happening over and over. And the number of such cases is increasing. These children are given pills to help them to focus but all those things are meant for the body. 

Me, being a metaphysical counselor, I talk from the spiritual aspect of a beam. I believe that before a child is a human being, he is a spiritual being or an emotional being, or a being who knows what is best for him. That’s the default setting of a being who knows what’s best for him, but we start granting that being permission to be who he is. Instead, we should not force so much on him. When being is put under so much pressure that it changes form, it becomes completely unsure of itself. He just always looks up to somebody who knows better than him. Among them are teachers, parents, books, schools, colleges, and universities. When you follow what these organizations, and institutes of people tell you to do for X number of years, you get a product- A confused individual who does not share an understanding of what is right or acceptable. He is in his own prison. And he doesn’t know how to get out of it. 

Recognize that the being in the body also has wisdom and you must let the wisdom come up. Don’t make that being a symbol of your strength or status. That is the first step – Recognize that the little body has a being and that being has the energy capable of unlimited potential, but you must give it some time and the environment to grow. Don’t label them with diseases like ADD, ADHD, and other names or labels. Don’t focus on them when your child needs YOUR help. 

First and foremost, I want to help you learn how to be the parents you should be, not how the child should be that you want him to be. Parenting needs to be learned. It is a very responsible job. 

You can always talk to me or call me or send me an email so that we can discuss more on this. Thank you.

YouTube Channel Name: Dr. Alka Chopra Madan

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